Holiday Stress – Depression -Resentment

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255

Tis The Season To Be Jolly!

Christmas for most means happy times with family, office parties, year-end party events, gifts, and a time to reflect on a year of success. It is truly a time to celebrate. For some, this time of year, being jolly is easier said than done. 

The other side of the coin is, this time of year, there is someone that does not have family, some one missing a loved one who is no longer here, some one who does not have a job, coworkers, or an office party, there is someone who will get no gifts, and there is someone who will not be invited to the year-end party events. Not to mention, as the year comes to an end, there is someone who is finishing up what is currently considered the worse year of their life.

To that person going through this time of year, challenge yourself to find your positive place.  I will admit that I do not know what it feels like to be missing a family member or loved one who is no longer here for the holidays.  I wouldn’t dare tell you how to feel.  In your situation, do what you need to get through is all I can offer without acting like I know it all. If you can’t find that positive place, I encourage you to reach out to someone and be open to a little help.  We all go through something and can use a little help from time to time.

This message is for that person whose year may have included a terrible break-up, divorce, unemployment, a struggling business, health problems, failed weight-loss attempts, drug addiction, alcohol abuse, eviction, feelings of helplessness, struggles with motivation, problems staying focused, working hard for no results, or loss of confidence.

To this group I say again, challenge yourself to find your positive place.

In these days with social media, as great as it is to stay connected, it can add to the Holiday Stress, Depression, and Feelings of Resentment when you see so many happy post from people excited about time with loved ones, Christmas parties, or celebrating their accomplishments for the year. The mind is tricky. Often the standard internal response to seeing these types of post is to tell yourself that they are full of it, they are faking for the camera, or their life isn’t really that great. If it doesn’t go there, it can go to an even worse place of hate. Not hate, as if you literally hate them, more of the “Hateraid” type hate.

That is the reason I say, challenge yourself to find your positive place.  That “Hater” mode can turn into a dark place that reduces your chances of turning things around for yourself any time soon.  One thing I think we all know is positive results don’t come from a negative mindset. It just doesn’t work that way.  The more negative we get the worse things seem to go. Whereas that positive person seems to continue to attract more wins or as we see it from our negative point of view, “They get all the breaks”.

If you are in that dark place right now and reading this, I know you are saying, OK Mr. Positive how exactly do I find that positive place that you speak of in a time like this?!

Fair question!

Everyone is different but let me tell you what worked for me this year. I am personally dealing with the worse financial year since I’ve been in business going back to 2013.  I am also in a year where on the surface I did a pretty decent job of weight loss.  However, a closer look at the numbers tells the true story.  That true story is I completed more than twice the number of workouts than I did in 2018 but ended with only half weight loss than the year before.  I spent the year training two professional boxers six days a week for 2-4 hours a day to only end up with one fighter getting one fight and one win for the year.  Let me add that up for you.  That is 2592 hours away from my family and business for one win!

Yes, we got the win but at what cost? Did I mention, this was the least I’ve made since starting my company. Let me explain that meant phone calls every month to and from bill collectors to keep this on and keep them from taking that.  We won’t even get on the hit on my credit…. Why am I sharing this? Truly to help you understand, I spent most of this year stressed enough to not even have to shave my head most days since the hair wouldn’t even grow.

One thing I took from this year, was at my lowest points I found myself in “Hater” mode often. In that state, I seemed to be getting hit with bad news and negative circumstance left and right. The best times I had this year came not long after I was about to look at someone else’s success or happiness and genuinely feel happy for them.

How was I able to feel happy for others when they were celebrating the very thing I was seeking and still missing?  Rather than me seeing their success as something taken from me, I saw it as positive signs that it was still possible for me as well.  Like when I walked in a business but couldn’t make it by the receptionist to talk to the person in charge of Safety, or my calls/messages were not returned, and or my emails/texts were ignored – When I would see someone doing similar work announce a class they had coming up – It brought hope. Hope in knowing there were still companies out there who cared about their workers safety.  I just needed to get in front of the right companies. That helped me brushed those “no’s” off and get up and get right back after it the next day with a positive mindset.

I will also admit, getting to this place wasn’t always easy. For me, it typically came after a good walk for a mile or three.  Some time out in nature on a slow to medium pace stroll seems to be what works best for me. Surprisingly, for me, this works even better than taking my frustrations out on the heavy bag.

Funny, thing, this very post comes after what was probably the slowest ever, two mile walk through my neighborhood. 

The walk cleared my head from dealing with a dead month business wise, got me out of a rut and back on the computer reaching out to companies.  So, I wanted to share this with someone who may be in a similar situation or a different situation but similar mind state.

It had built up on me heavy, but I took my own advice, and challenged myself to find my positive place.

Challenging myself to find my positive place often throughout this year allowed me to complete one of my greatest accomplishments in my life.  I’m not going to tell you what that accomplishment was here, because I don’t want the message of this posted to be missed with you thinking this was just a cheesy sales plug…

I truly hope sharing my situation and this post helps someone!

All things considered; this still is a difficult time of year for many people. It may not always seem like it, but there are people that care about you. National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255

Please Like, Share and Forward this number to people in your network. You may help save a life this Christmas.

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